A
lot of what I have alluded to in this blog are the actual treatments I did to
get better, supplements that helped me, adjunct holistic therapies, diet,
and detox tips. One thing I have touched on, only slightly, is the emotional
aspect of Lyme.
I
want to talk more about that. Many people ask me "what do you attribute to
you most getting better?" If I had to tell you ONE essential thing, I would say it
was…….
…….
the huge emotional shift I underwent during Lyme: the breaking down of my
old unhealthy patterns and relationships, the getting to the core of what got
me to being so sick that I was bedridden for more years than I care to
remember, the unresolved emotional blocks and traumas from childhood (my being a Type A
overachiever, always helping others before myself until my downfall, validating
my self-worth unknowingly on others' approval, among a variety of other
things!), the change in my MINDSET, AND the ability to see the
experience a blessing in disguise. Yes, I just said that last part.
Out loud.
Lyme transformed me more than I ever thought possible, because I allowed myself to experience the raw darkness, and then allowed myself to experience the great light that came from that. The transformation really changed my way of seeing the world, for the better.
REAL RAW UNPLEASANT FEELINGS
I
don't expect anyone to be jumping with joy going through the roller
coaster of emotional and physical pain related to Lyme Disease. I was
angry, depressed, horribly frightened, confused, hopeless, jealous, pissed off
for years when I was sick. Then, I slowly came to this new place - where I was able to HEAL
the unresolved emotional and spiritual blocks - while doing my antibiotics, my IVs, my holistic treatments, etc. Every day was not butterflies
and rainbows, but more and more moments I was able to see through the
darkness. More often than not, a 10 minute walk felt like I ran a triathlon. I was able to
APPRECIATE the small things in life - like stopping to stare at a flower (because I had nothing else to do with my time and couldn't really walk very far). And some moments DID seem like butterflies
and rainbows even in the midst of being disabled! Then, of course, anger, and sadness, and fear returned. But they did so in MUCH smaller doses.
I
worked with a therapist, of course, to help me just make sense of the fact that
my life was akin to a sedated vegetable. But, after a while, it did
not help to talk about my problems repeatedly. I was sick, VERY
sick. I could not function. I needed someone to spoon feed me at
times, and sometimes I crawled to the bathroom. My life as I knew it as a
20-something unraveled to pieces scattered SO far and SO wide that I couldn't
even see any resemblance of who I was. Talking about it over and over was not helping me, personally (I am not advocating for you to stop seeing a therapist if you are seeing one, only relaying my personal experience).
SLOW
BUT STEADY TRANSFORMATION and COMING OUT OF LYME
So
I stopped working with my therapist (who was amazing but whose help I no longer found useful), and I went INWARD. I had the help of another person (feel free to email me if
interested in his name). I read and listened all the spiritual books & CDs I could: Eckhart
Tolle, Wayne Dyer, Louise Hay, Bruce Lipton. I kept putting this information in
my brain even on days when I didn't feel any difference from it. Even on days when I wanted to put it off and go under the bed (if I could make it that far) and cry for hours. BUT,
over time, my subconscious brain PICKED UP the positive messages that I needed to
hear and see (I also had inspirational quotes ALL over my room). I listened to people like Bruce Lipton and others, who talked
about how much of our own beliefs about ourselves go into our health. I know we
all hear this, but do you know there is scientific proof of this?? Read below...
Dr.
EMOTO's EXPERIMENTS ON THOUGHTS AND HEALTH
Dr.
Masaru Emoto, a researcher and alternative healer from Japan, is
the author of the famous "Hidden Messages in Water"
book. This book has the potential to profoundly transform your world
view. Using high-speed photography, Dr. Masaru Emoto discovered that
crystals formed in frozen water reveal changes when specific, concentrated
thoughts are directed toward them. He found that water from clear springs and water
that has been exposed to LOVING WORDS shows brilliant, complex, and colorful
snowflake patterns. In contrast, water exposed to NEGATIVE thoughts,
forms incomplete, asymmetrical patterns with dull colors. The implications
of this research create a new awareness of how we can positively impact the
earth and our personal health. Given that humans are comprised of at
least 60% water, his discovery has far reaching implications on the impact of negative thoughts and words (not just from your own mind, but from anyone else as well). So, make sure you are surrounding yourself with the right kind of people.
Dr. Emoto showed the world a good deal of evidence of the magic of POSITIVE THINKING
again, below:
The rice
experiment is another famous Emoto demonstration of the power of
negative thinking (and conversely, the power of positive thinking.) Dr Emoto
placed portions of cooked rice into two containers. On one container he
wrote “thank you” and on the other “you fool.” He then instructed school
children to say the labels on the jars out loud everyday when they passed them
by. After 30 days, the rice in the container with positive thoughts had
barely changed, while the other was moldy and rotten. Check it out here.
I
am not here to tell you to ignore your painful feelings. Lyme is a traumatic
disease. In my opinion, it is the most traumatic disease on the planet. It is
incomprehensible. Experience your raw feelings, indeed the only way out of them is
through. Life will not be all rainbows and butterflies. But go within yourself and turn the negative energy that may be
lingering inside into something positive for YOURSELF, and slowly, over
time, you will notice a shift. By all means, ask for help (from friends,
family, religious or spiritual community, some of the authors above, meditation
class, email me if you need other ideas at monamorphosis at gmail dot com).
If
you have resentments towards others, no matter how wrongly they behaved, work
on forgiveness. There are many techniques around forgiveness: the ancient
Hawaiian practice of ho'oponopono, EFT, etc. Forgiveness is
important because anger only poisons you. This overall shift is what I
believe got me out of Lyme Disease: a huge spiritual transformational shift in
how I saw the experience of my life, Lyme, and my ability to get myself out.
The treatments got me out too, but without the inner work, I know I would
not be where I am today.
• I completely changed my
relationship to the outside world and my family (that latter relationships was
very toxic).
• I learned to say NO and
take care of myself first. Then, and only then, could I take care of
others.
• I expressed my anger, fear, sadness in the
proper outlets, or journaled about it, and then worked on
forgiveness, and other ways to clear through those emotions.
• I stopped blaming
circumstances or people for why I could not feel better or be happy. I was able to be
happy DESPITE feeling ill. It was a pretty cool thing to experience, actually. And once you are able to be happy despite the circumstances of your body through Lyme, you are pretty much able to handle anything.
• I started to do everything
possible to make sure I BELIEVED I could get better, with positive
thoughts and intentions surrounding me.
"Suffice
It to say that whenever you want to improve anything in your life, there's only
one place to look: inside you. When you look, do it with love."
TIPS for implementing this in your life
1. Practice Gratitude on a
DAILY basis. Some
days I could think of nothing to be grateful for because I was
so miserable. Often I said easy things like: "I am grateful for having 2 legs to walk, a
roof over my head, my friends to support me." Anything to remind you of
what you DO have. I made a gratitude bowl and wrote on 5 little pieces
of paper what I was grateful for at the end of each day.
2. Put inspirational, positive
things and people around you. I printed up inspiring quotes and put them on my walls. I made a
collage (my mom helped me) of pictures of me when I was super healthy and happy
and I looked at it every day, to keep visualizing myself being that
healthy again. If you feel there are no inspirational people around you, keep
practicing gratitude for those who do provide to you, and more and more of
these people will show up in your life.
3. Work through emotional
blocks. Most
human beings have a lot to go through emotionally, but Lyme patients have
a whole added level of insane things to process. See a therapist, counselor, healer, talk to a friend, write a journal, do anything to make sure you have a way and place to
safely express your feelings.
4. Meditate. I cannot tell you how
much this has benefited me. If you are just starting, or feel reluctant to
start, try the free app called "HeadSpace." It guides you through
SIMPLE, easy 10 minute meditations for 10 days in a row.
5. Create joy with simple things! The easiest way to raise your vibration is to do anything, NO MATTER HOW small, that will make you feel better. Even if you have to cheat on your gluten-free, sugar-free, dairy-free, diet to sneak in a piece of chocolate pie (if it won't destroy your stomach), do it. Take a bubble bath with lavender oil. Watch a funny movie. Treat yourself to a massage or pedicure. Watch re-runs of your favorite show. Watch you tubes of puppies or orangutans or airplanes or whatever makes you SMILE. Invite a friend over that you know can make you laugh. Joy is so essential for human beings, and it is so rarely experienced by Lyme patients, so remind yourself you are doing an amazing job battling this disease, and give yourself something that soothes your senses.
Still
working on the ebooks and guides on my protocols, detox, diet, etc. if you want
to be on my mailing list, please send your email to monamorphosis at gmail dot com. I
will send updates there as to when the ebooks are done, and also migrate
content and information for Lyme patients over to private non-spam
newsletters.
