Top 10 Things Commonly Missed When Treating Lyme (i.e. Why Am I Not Getting Better?)

I MOST often hear from people with Lyme Disease that they (1) are just not getting better or (2) have improved but such improvement has come to a plateau. (Remember, it's normal, but oh so damn painful, to go in roller-coaster ups and downs with Lyme and co-infections). Often, people I meet with Lyme ask me how they should know when it's time to try a different antibiotic, different treatment, or even different doctor?

I'll address below what experience has taught me: 10 things that I find are most commonly missed when treating Lyme. Remember, YOU are your own best advocate AND doctor, and most in tune with what your body needs. Disclaimer: Nothing in this post or site should be construed as medical advice. Each individual should consult with his/her practitioner or doctor to work out a treatment plan that is right for them.



From my experience, with the benefit of hindsight, I can say the following: When I felt as ill as I did in roller coaster fashion over the past 5 years of treatment, I can say with certainty that I OFTEN felt like I was going nowhere and would NEVER get better. But I was wrong. I never believed I would get where I was today. I bet many of you feel the same thing. But you CAN and WILL get better.

I was so ill that I remember waking up one morning and putting a pen in the freezer and was often unable to make a piece of toast. I used a wheelchair to get around the airport and stores, and I could barely make the 45 second walk to my parents' mailbox. I felt like there was a blender in my brain on high speed while on a spaceship most nights. I felt such dark depression I felt I would rather die than endure such pain. Then the trajectory improved, slowly but surely. The ride got less rocky, and the bad days got fewer and farther between, to barely there at all.

With a lot of research, annoying amounts of positive thinking and spiritual readings, I got to where I am today, which is between 85 - 100%, depending on the day! I am working again, active, and enjoying and living life.

So to answer the questions above, here are some things that I believe all Lyme patients should make sure they are considering if they are not already. Please not I am NOT advocating to address ALL of many of these issues below at the same time. Doing so would have likely have horrific consequences and you would probably be very very ill. Just make sure you keep an eye on each of these issues, with a note to come back to it at some point in your treatment (your doctor may be great, but even they can forget). This is what I did. I had a HUGE binder of labs and doctor's notes, and typed up all my notes from doctor's appointments documenting what had to be done now, and in the future. Highly recommend doing this. I was very ill but had nobody there to do this for me. If you cannot do it, see if a friend or family member or even nurse can help you with this.

Note, I had to have 1 LLMD and 1 LLND (Naturopath) to be able to get all of this taken care of, and even, then, things were missed.

I know how overwhelming it is to be your own advocate and manage your own health to a tee, but it's ESSENTIAL. If you are not feeling as well as you think you should be, some things you should ask your practitioner about or research:

1. Hormone Imbalance - Adrenal fatigue and/or Thyroid Issues (often in tandem): Can cause extreme fatigue, dizziness, depression, anxiety, insomnia, cold extremities, immune weakness, inability to tolerate stress, memory issues (brain fog), and many other symptoms
2. Viruses - Chronic Viral infections, which many if not most Lyme patients have (HHV-6, Epstein-Barr, CMV, etc.): Biggest symptom for me was MAJOR fatigue. ***My LLND noted that when brain fog was associated with fatigue, it might be more viral. When the fatigue is not related to brain fog, it is most likely something else (Lyme, co-infections, other). This distinction was needed when I got better and had to differentiate between what was leftover Lyme and what was viral. It may not present when in the very very ill stage, but I thought it was a helpful tool for figuring out some of my symptoms as I got better.
3. Candida/Yeast or Mold: Can cause fatigue, depression, irritability, memory issues, and many other symptoms
4. Heavy Metals: Can cause tingling/numbness in extremities, fatigue, headache, immune weakness, and many other symptoms
5. Adequate Detoxification Protocol: I have a list of detox supplements and ideas in my blog posts and here. When I was NOT doing a detox routine, I almost died. I initially saw an LLMD who just put me on straight Mepron and Zithromax with no mention at ALL of detox supplements and protocols and I literally felt like I was dying for 3 months straight. My mother spoon-fed me daily and I crawled to the bathroom. NOT THE DESIRED RESULT. But I thought this was necessary to get better. I had just been diagnosed and had NO idea. I had NO detox routine, and had no idea that I was herxing so badly that it was counterproductive to my treatment. My LLMD did not tell me any of this. His staff did NOT call back when I called in with these symptoms, frantic and unable to move. Needless to say, I fired him!
6. Methylation Pathways : this is the way in which your body detoxes. Ask your practitioner or an ND about the test to do this. The 'fix' is an easy protocol of 5 affordable (relatively speaking) supplements taken together.
7. Unresolved Emotional Blocks to Healing: I could do a whole post on this one. It still surprises me how much emotional stress or turmoil can affect my health. It REALLY does. More so for some than others. For me, it's a big one.
8. Homocysteine levels: Often a marker of inflammation; again my LLND used this blood test (covered by insurance, hooray!) to see if there was something else going on after Lyme/co-infections had really gone under and I was in 'clean-up mode' (cleaning up all the other remaining things - viruses, parasites, etc. leftover). If you are at a point where you are not sure what is what (Lyme vs. viral fatigue, etc)., this might be useful.
9. Parasites: these can cause a lot of issues in many people. I know people without Lyme who have parasites either acquired in the first world or traveling abroad. Taking an anti-parasitic may help; but note killing off TOO much in your body (Lyme, parasites, viruses, etc.) all at ONCE can be very overwhelming. I, personally, experienced some horrific toxicity from taking an anti-parasitic prescription for a few weeks. It took me 2 months to recover and this was in early 2012, when I was doing quite well. I HIGHLY recommend taking any parasite protocol SLOW or holding off until your body can handle it. Even my LLND, who I ADORE and respect highly, got this one wrong. He knew I was sensitive, but it was just too much for my body for some reason. Again, this is just my experience. Yours may be different. One product I use now is A-P (I can tell you where to get this as I don't want to reveal my LLND's name due to sensitivity issues about Lyme treatment). It's an herbal, and very mild.
10. Food Intolerance: I used the Body Ecology Diet as my go-to-guide for eating when I was sick. I took out all gluten, dairy, almost all sugar, and many other inflammatory foods. Doing some basic food elimination can help you see what might be irritating your system.

As great as my LLMD and LLND (Naturopathic Lyme Doc) were, there were still times when they would overlook something or make a decision that didn't benefit me. I did not blame them; they were overwhelmed with so many very ill patients and so many with different stories. I often had to use my own intuitive hits on what I felt was right to try. I also consulted with my healers, and acupuncturists on their take as well. I have a great group I have worked with in San Franciso, that do what is called IMT. If you'd like their name, please email me.

I have a lot of advice on each subject listed above, but will not go into more details here. If you have questions, please email me. Again, please note that each of us is SO different that it is often a trial and error game. This is not comforting, but know that something will eventually work. And then that may not feel so great, and then it's time to address the next thing.

I hope this post was helpful (though I am sure very painful for those of you who do not want to be on the computer or read for a long time).


Disclaimer: Nothing in this post or site should be construed as medical advice. Each individual should consult with his/her practitioner or doctor to work out a treatment plan that is right for them.

Transcending Pain

I have a bunch of new post material with tips that I hope will be helpful for you...I have so much information that I want to spread it out into various posts (don't want to overwhelm with long posts because I can go on and on). If there are topics/issues you might have questions about, please email me at monamorphosis@gmail.com, and I can see if I have enough knowledge to do a post on that topic.

In the meantime, I have been going through some painful emotional (and physical) ups and downs. I know all of you understand this rollercoaster all too well. It was so hard for me to keep my positive attitude when I was sick, when one day or week I was feeling ok or even better than ok or even well, and then BOOM, I went 5 steps backwards again. Though my physical symptoms, now, post-Lyme are much fewer, far between, and less disabling, they still arise occasionally. And it is a doozy to try to figure it out.

I have been reading this book, "The Untethered Soul." HIGHLY recommend it to any of you who are needing some spiritual guidance. I copied, with permission, some highlights on pain. It really helped me when I was in a dark or difficult place the last month. Hope it sheds a little light on your journey as well.



"Simply view inner pain as temporary shift in your energy flow. As energy passing through your heart and before the eye of your consciousness....There is no reason to fear this experience. Pain is not a problem. It's just a thing in the universe...it's a thing in the universe that is passing through your system....don't be afraid of it. It cannot touch you unless you touch it....you must learn to transcend the tendency to avoid the pain. Then RELAX. Relax and release. Relax your heart until you are actually face to face with the exact place where it hurts.

Be present right at place of pain, then relax and go even deeper. This is very deep growth and TRANSFORMATION. If you close around the pain and stop it from passing through, it will stay in you.

Every single time you relax and release, a piece of the pain leaves FOREVER.

On the other side of pain is ecstasy. On the other side is freedom. Your true greatness hides on the other side of that layer of pain. Sometimes you may feel tremendous heat in your heart as you relax into the energy of the pain. This is the pain being PURIFIED from your heart.

In truth, pain is the price of freedom. And the moment you are willing to pay that price, you will no longer be afraid.

If you stay open, the blocked energy inside of you will release naturally, and you will not take on any more. This is the core of spiritual work. When you are comfortable with the pain passing through you, you will be free.

You will begin to have truly beautiful experiences rise up within you. Eventually, you will understand that there is an ocean of love behind all of this fear and pain.

**It is often said that you must go through the darkest night in order to get to the infinite light.**

I understand these words may be hard to hear when you may be suffering amounts that no human can imagine and you want to tell me to go somewhere the sun don't shine! I remember what it was like to be attached to my bed and IV pole and crawl to the bathroom. And, sometimes, when people told me to have a positive attitude, I wanted to tell them to also go somewhere the sun don't shine. BUT, from the other side, I just want to let you know it gets better. I truly think 50% of my healing came from being able to release the pain, so I hope this passage helps just a little.

Few minutes to fill out the Lyme Disease Map Project!

Inspiration for today


LYME DISEASE MAP PROJECT - take a few minutes to fill it out!

A friend who had Lyme passed this along to me and I hope each of you who has had Lyme or has Lyme Disease will take the few minutes to fill it out: the Lyme Disease Map Project.

The Lyme Disease Map Project is a voluntary study to evaluate the effectiveness of social networking for public health education and to prevent the spread of Lyme disease. To explore the map, click on the pinpoints and read the personal stories of people who have had Lyme disease.

It took me less than 4 minutes to pinpoint myself (no identifying information) on the map, and explain my story in brief. If we can get all real Lyme cases on this map, we will have a better idea of how many people really have Lyme (according to us, not the CDC or MDs who do not believe in or even report the Lyme epidemic). More about this project project.

On another note, I have been dealing with some ups/downs physically. I know all Lyme warriors go through this rollercoaster of UPS and DOWNS, whether they are small or big (let me tell you the good news is that they get less intense until they are really mildly bothersome). I do have a lot of great information to pass along that I learned from many healers, LLMDs, a naturopath on addressing all of this. I will write this out in another post soon.

I also will do a post on "What to do when antibiotics are no longer an option." This was the case for me many years ago after a few years of treatment with antibiotics; even with a picc line in and daily improvements with IV antibiotics, I had to stop because of the acute pancreatitis I developed from the antibiotics. I was hopeless. I had tried herbs before, and they were not strong enough to counter the level of Lyme and it the co-infections that were ravaging my body. I believed antibiotics were the ONLY thing that could cure me. But this was a blessing in disguise because I found an incredibly potent holistic treatment protocol that has worked wonders and really got me to where I am today! More to come soon...Remember, there is ALWAYS hope...when one door closes, another really does open.

Tidbits of Health Info

I am going to start using my blog as more of a dissemination of information for those with Lyme, recovering from Lyme, or other chronic illnesses (rather than as an update for my friends and family). I also am in the midst of writing my full protocol and what worked for me to get past Lyme Disease. I know different things work for different people, but I want to share what I have learned.

I have transitioned into the world of wellness, working and exercising again, having recovered from Lyme though I still deal with strange things and symptoms occasionally. So I still eat the most healthy diet I can (most of the time), take care of my body, mind, and see the practitioners I need to to make sure everything is doing well.

Detoxification
Detox is essential when on treatments (antibiotic or holistic) and even when not on any kind of treatment. This is because there are toxins everywhere in our world. I keep learning more and more about what is toxic everywhere, and it frightens me. I do what I can (and can afford) to keep myself safe, but I also try not to over-stress. I realize stress is the grand exacerbat-or of any illness or symptom!

• Detox Smoothie: 1 bunch organic dandelion greens, water, 1 full lemon (can keep peel on or off, as the peel itself is very detoxifying; make sure it’s organic if using the peel), 1 organic apple (I use Fuji), and blend. This comes out in a great consistency if you have a Vitamix. Dandelion greens help cleanse the liver as does lemon. Apple is great for the gall bladder, and helps take away the bitter taste of the dandelion green and smoothie and make it palatable. Additionally, if you are on IV antibiotics, the apple is great to help cleanse your gall bladder (I did this smoothie 5x/week when I was on IV meds for Lyme). Other benefits of dandelion I just learned here.
• Mosonatural bags. I stumbled across this product at a Golden Gate National Park store at Land’s End in San Francisco. I bought one for each room and the car. Made of 100% Moso Bamboo Charcoal, this air purifying bag is non-toxic, fragrance free, and scientifically proven to absorb bacteria, harmful pollutants (including formaldehyde, ammonia, benzene, chloroform, and other gases emitted from paint, carpeting, furniture, rubber, and plastic), and allergens. I am still sensitive to chemicals so this is a great product, and a great addition to keep your environment clean.




Emotional Well-Being

I think most people with Lyme Disease or any other ongoing condition understand the connection that emotional well-being has to our physical health. I firmly believe my work with many different healers and practitioners for years around my past emotional patterns was half the reason I got better. I think each person is dealing with a different set of stressors, and each person internalizes them differently. I will go more into detail in future posts, but I have to say as I encounter any fear, stress, anxiety, or sadness in daily life, meditation has an enormously POSITIVE impact on any of those feelings.

I went to a 45 minute meditation class Friday, and did some basic sitting meditation with Pranayama breathing. I felt 50x better than when I came in, feeling a bit sad, anxious, exhausted, and in a lot of pain from a recent car crash a few weeks ago. I highly recommend even 5 - 10 minutes a day of meditation. I have been practicing meditation for 8 years, but I have not consistently practiced. Even when I was sick. It was sometimes too scary to go sit in that place, but often it was what I needed most. When I did practice, especially consistently, I felt the most balanced.

Diet

I still eat a primarily gluten-free, dairy-free, alcohol-free, caffeine-free, very low sugar, anti-inflammatory diet. I cheat once in a while but I find I feel so much better when I eat this way. The reason for taking out these substances is that it reduces inflammation. The removal or reduction of sugar is also a huge part of creating a well-functioning immune system. There are many studies that show sugar feeds cancer cells and wreaks havoc on immune systems.

Before I got sick, I ate 4 pints of Ben & Jerry's ice cream weekly. Plus cookies and candy. And sweetened drinks. I always had a high metabolism, so gaining weight was not a concern, but I had this unhealthy high-sugar lifestyle since I was a little girl. I slowly weaned off of ALL sugar (over 3 months), including vinegar and honey. It was a painful experience, headaches, irritation, etc. But I don't even crave sugar anymore. I actually feel sick if I eat too much sugar. I remember cheating one Thanksgiving when I was treating Lyme, and eating pecan pie, pumpkin pie, all kinds of desserts. I felt sick for a week straight! I eat fruit now in moderation, and occasionally treat myself to a dessert when I crave it. If all of this seems overwhelming, try to simply cut out one item at a time, and do it slowly. You don't want to overwhelm your body. And you want to keep some happiness in there. For me, eating is joy. So treating myself to something delicious and 'off' my diet every now and then keeps me happy.

FYI, I based my diet on the Body Ecology Diet, a book someone recommended to me. Highly recommend it. It explains all the reasons for cutting out certain foods as well as recipes.

*Note, I am receiving no financial or other compensation for the books or products I have mentioned or endorsed today; I am doing so because of my personal positive experience with them.

Wishing you health, happiness, and well-being!

Tribute to a Fallen Lyme Warrior: Jeremiah K

Tragic news about Jeremiah Katches, a Lyme patient who passed away a few days ago. This tribute to his life and their relationship with him by Mara Williams and her daughter Sara Donnelly, who I have been working with on Inanna House. The contents below are viewable with pictures at: http://www.inannahouse.org/. Mara's daughter has late-stage Lyme and Mara and Sara are fierce Lyme Disease advocates.



From Mara Williams

Jeremiah Katches died Friday February 15, 2013. I know that he was suffering greatly, and in intense pain. I am so saddened by his passing. His art speaks to the man he was- creative, loving, strong, and kind. He got Lyme while in the military. He fought for the United States and then his country let him down by denying his illness.

Too many are suffering for years and then dying. How can a soul prevail when one continues to suffer and not move forward? How can someone recover when they have limited resources? Treating Lyme is expensive and all consuming, sometimes for years. Spiritually, I believe no one agreed to take on these infections but because of other agreements were vulnerable to being overwhelmed by infection.

Jeremiah had a deep faith that helped to give him hope. He was a fighter. And, now he is gone from this world. Let his passing be a galvanizing point of light for the rest of the Lyme community, that along with all the others who have not made it, leads us to become one, united to build a place where healing can happen for anyone, including those with no ability to pay.

If every person with Lyme, and every one of their family members and friends, were to donate just five or ten dollars, we would have enough to build at least two Inanna Houses. I have no agenda saying this other than to make you think. If Inanna House had been a reality, Jeremiah might have made it. I pray that not another person dies due to Lyme disease. May the power of community make it so.

Thank you and Blessings, Mara




My daughter Sara, who has mostly remained behind the scenes in the creation of Inanna House, chose to write something about Jeremiah. They became friends after working together on his Lyme Artist of The Month page. She speaks from her heart, saddened by our loss, as so many others are...

From Sara...

My name is Sara Donnelly, I am 34 years old and I suffer from Chronic Lyme Disease. I suffer because my fellow human beings are suffering. I suffer because my sister suffers. I suffer because my friend Jeremiah was suffering, and is now gone from this world.

My suffering does not come from the physical pain that so many Lyme patients have, because in fact, I have never been bitten by a tick. My suffering does not come from the insomnia, vomiting, fevers, and shakes that so many Lyme patients deal with daily, because in fact, I don't have the actual Lyme infection.

My suffering comes from a place of knowing that if one suffers, we all suffer. My suffering comes from a place of knowing that there can never be right, if so many are wronged.

I got involved with Inanna House as a way to help my mother. Inanna House was her vision, her dream. It was through communications everyday with people needing help, no where to go, no money for treatment, frustrated, overwhelmed, alone, that I saw it was way more than that. I started to "get it". This is a huge issue, enormous. It is not only isolated to my sister, or a few people here or there claiming a mysterious disease that no one seems to know about. This is a debilitating, painful disease, that in fact, is killing people.

I came up with the idea for the Inanna House Lyme Artist of The Month shortly after Jeremiah reached out to me on Twitter. He had heard about Inanna House and wanted to help, he wanted to do something for the Lyme community. That was the kind of person he was, even though he was suffering so much with his own illness, he still wanted to help others and build awareness. It was from seeing his passion and love for photography that I realized it was through art that he, and so many others, cope with the hardships of Lyme. I asked him to be our first artist. He was so ecstatic about showing his work and telling his story. He loved taking photos, it was his out, his escape.

The current health care system failed Jeremiah, there is no other way to say it. I can not help but feel as if I failed him as well. He was crying out for help, he needed help, he did not get help. He did not have to die. He was a warrior and fought through more pain and hardship than any man should have to in one lifetime. There is only so much one can take, and I pray that he is well now. I pray that his broken body is strong and he can once again be active, run around, shoot some hoops, look down upon his family that he so loved, and feel no pain.

I know that because I do not have actual Lyme disease that I can never fully understand what it is like. I want you, Lyme community, to know that I am here though, and now more than ever we need Inanna House. We need others to see and realize that this is out of control, criminal, and nothing short of a travesty. We need to come together and make this happen ourselves. We need to become like water and make our own path. We need to build the new reality that makes the old model obsolete. I promise, for you, my sister, others who have fought but lost their battle, that I will not give up. And I promise you Jeremiah, my friend, that I will not stop fighting for the change you so needed. I will miss you, as will so many others you have touched in this life.

Sara

DAILY INSPIRATION

I know many of you are still struggling with Lyme Disease (or for those of you that are not dealing with Lyme Disease, perhaps something else). One of my dear friends who started this journey with me at the same time (we 'met' through an online support group and became dear friends through our struggles) still struggles with Lyme Disease. My heart breaks when I hear that she is still not doing well and unable to feel like herself in most ways.

Having been blessed with recovery, and a normal life again, I feel it is my duty to share what I did to get better with others. At the very least, I should provide inspiration to those who are still struggling. When I was undiagnosed, sick for years, and then sick through treatment for years after that, I looked everywhere for HOPE from someone who had recovered from Lyme. I could not find but one. This, of course, contributed to hopelessness.

I am here to tell you that you CAN and WILL get better. I never DREAMED I would be doing what I am today. I have started working on my small booklets (the most important of which I believe will be an outline of everything I did to get better) to share with this community. I promise to work on them more in the New Year (but work and life are quite busy), but please feel free to bug me via email to encourage me to finish them. I know not everyone will get better the way I did, but I have a lot of information to share that I believe can at least help.

For now, I will provide you with some hope. When everyone else is celebrating the holidays and you feel blue (I remember this very well from years past), please remember that ANYTHING is possible. Miracles do happen. My first LLMD told me I would never get better (I quickly changed doctors). I proved him wrong. HOPE can never be taken away. If you want some inspiration from days when I was in IV treatment for Lyme and could see through the light, see this post. To that vein, here are a few inspirational quotes:

"When you have come to the edge of all the light you have
And step into the darkness of the unknown
Believe that one of the two will happen to you
Either you'll find something solid to stand on
Or you'll be taught how to fly!"

~Richard Bach, best-selling author.

"Kites rise highest against the wind - not with it." ~Winston Churchill, was a British politician and statesman known for his leadership of the United Kingdom during the Second World War.

"Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortune; but great minds rise above them." ~Washington Irving, was an American author, essayist, biographer and historian of the early 19th century.

Also, for those of you really feeling you need to try something new - 2 women on the CA Lyme group who did not get better through traditional LLMDs or other complicated holistic treatment posted that they BOTH became symptom-free and healthy through an Ayurvedic doctor from India (I am not promoting this doctor nor do I get any sort of incentive for promoting him). He is visiting the U.S. in 2013. I also saw a doctor in NYC for many months (and still work with remotely) that helped me get to where I am today. I am happy to provide either doctor name to you in a private email.

With warm wishes for health, happiness, and peace...Mona

Pretty long video, but WELL WORTH IT.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rixyrCNVVGA

As those of us who have endured Lyme Disease, or still continue to endure it, know, everything we eat and put in our body affects how we feel. It is sad to me that most of the nation doesn't understand the importance of the environment, food, and how much it affects our health.

What is in this video is NOT new to most of us: eating safe, non-genetically modified organic food free from antibiotics and hormones is essential to feeling well. But, Robyn O'Brien does an amazing job illustrating the story, the facts behind all of this, how the food industry perpetuates this cycle of ilness-causing foods, and why good clean food is still inaccessible to most people (cost). Some interesting stats from her talk: Americans spend more on health care than any other country, and have more cancer than any other country. 1 in 10 breast cancers is genetic; the other 9 are due to environment (according to Robyn).

I struggled with convincing my parents to buy me only organic food, and the grocery bills were so high for the 6 years that I was sick. They thought it was all BS. My bills grocery continue to be high because I refuse to put anything else in my body even though it's not in my 'budget.' But being disabled, in bed, and sick again is also not in my 'budget.' I need to keep myself healthy.

I hope we can change the policies of this country so that the food industry stops inherently contributing to illness. I don't think 'regular/healthy' people realize how important this is; I have many friends who have the means to eat organic/pesticide-free but do not. I suspect this is because the message hasn't alarmed people enough. The message needs to be loud and clear HOW dangerous chemicals, pesticides, and other agents in our food are.

I hope we can drive this point home to many so we can prevent more illness in this country.

Even the American Pediatrics Association (hardly characterized as holistic or radical) reported that the evidence is “robust” for associations between pesticide exposure and cancer (specifically brain tumors and leukemia) and “adverse” neurodevelopment, including lowered I.Q., autism, and attention disorders and hyperactivity in children. The article is here. The APA linking pesticides to these health concerns is VERY alarming in my view.

My dear friend Johonna has been creating a blog of ways to keep ourselves healthy, in home, food, everything we do - I learned about both of the above pieces from her.
http://www.littlegreenmoments.com/

I feel it is our duty to educate others about what we have learned. So please share this information with those you love, and let's try try to get consumer demand for clean foods high enough so that EVERYONE can afford it.